You moved on, and so should I. HOW DARE you make out with her in front of me. FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU. How dare you kiss her in front of me & then look back to see if my face dropped. HOW DARE YOU.


OF COURSE MY SMILE DROPPED. MY HEART ALSO DROPPED 10,000 FEET. It's mandatory that I move on. FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU.



*Parade tomorrow. Ugh. I hope it rains and gets canceled, LOL.

I feel neglected . . especially from J____.

Somehow, something is pulling me back and preventing me from moving on. What's wrong with me?..



EDIT* 1100pm

The only reason I'm watching Idol this season.:) Been following him on youtube way before he entered the show.


I voted for him like right after the show was over. Andrew FTW!

Who has seen you in your underwear lately?
. . Pervert, why do you ask? -__-

Is it awkward when you run into your exes?
I only run into two of them EVERY FUCKING DAY. One is in my music class and one is in my ceramics class. All the other ones are gone.

Have you kissed someone this past week?
Noo.

When did you last talk to your brother or sister?
Like 30 minutes ago, when I said “Give me the laptop!” Hah

What did you do the last time you were home alone?
What I always do, eat or sleep or bump music. Haha

Do you ever wanna know who you are going to marry?
No.

How much cash do you have on you?
$34

What does you last text say?
Catrina reminded me to bring my phone charger tomorrow.

Are you tanned?
Hahahaha no.

Are you upset with anyone?
Not reeaally.

Do you talk to the person you have a thing for?
You mean, HAD a thing for..

Have you ever seen your best friend cry?
No, they act & look like tough guys, but they’re actually big softies. LOL

Did you get any compliments today?
Yeaahs. My hair apparently has more volume than everyone’s that was with me. -__-

Have you ever gone to court?
No, I couldn’t handle it. It looks so boring.

Are you friends with your neighbors?
I don’t even know my new neighbors. They don't care about me. x)

Have you ever punched a guy?
I tried. LOL

Do you get jealous easily?
Oh yes. But I don’t show it.

Egged someones house?
Noo, I’d feel bad afterwards.

Have you ever gone to the beach?
NOOOOO -___- But I live near the beach?! Who hasn’t been there dude..

What are you listening to?
The tv and Trey Songz

Do you remember your music teachers name from elementry school?
Yes, because I didn’t have a music teacher in elementary.

How good is your eyesight?
Oh goshh, not that good >.<

Would you ever want to swim with the sharks?
I would drown before they even get to eat me.

Have you ever been out of your country?
Noo.

What’s on your mind whenever you're near your most recent ex?
Well, everytime I walk by Jerry, I can smell him. Because he puts on a lot of cologne and I’m so used to the smell.. :| Goshh, memories..

Would your parents be mad if you got suspended for fighting?
No, actually. They would actually beat my ass if I LOST the fight!

Do you have a Honda, Toyota or Nissan?
.. Why do you ask? It’s because I’m Asian huh.

What time did you wake up this morning?
630AM. >___< Uuhhhg.

What are you doing Saturday?
Gotta parade to go to. UGH

What is in your back pocket?
I have no back pockets.

What were you doing at 3am this morning?
Sleeping, duuh.

What do you usually do first in the morning?
Go back to sleep for a few more minutes.

Who is your favorite band?
Fall out Boy, I guess.

Slept in a different bed?
Like a week ago or so. Slept in Lynne’s bed cause I was tired.

Thought your cousin was hot?
Ew, never.

Been in love?
WTF is love?

Slept in past noon?
*sighh summer.

Gone over the speed limit?
I can’t even drive yet. :(

What color is your room?
Orange.

Gotten a hickey?
.. Jerry :|

Gotten in a car with people you just met?
This Filipino lady offered me a ride when I was walking home, and she said that I shouldn’t walk home on a hot day like this. I trusted her for some reason, idk. She was nice. :)

Been in a fist fight?
No. I’m weak.

Snuck out of your house?
PSHHH. My parents would notice if I was gone -___-

Had feelings for someone who did not have them back?
Probably.

Made out with a stranger?
Ew, no.

Ditched school to do something more fun?
That was a long time ago, I don’t ditch school anymore. It’s not worth it.

What should you be doing now?
IDK, you tell me.

Rafael: Hey. :\ Its me Rafa. Just checking up on you hope your okay. Bye.

Ahww, his txt message made me smile. :) Even though he's mad at me, he still cares.


Anthony: Hey, so the first time I've called you in like a million years, and you don't pick up. Thought you needed some cheering up from what happened. Well I'm about to go out now. So I'll call you tomorrow?

It was good to hear his voice even though it was in my voicemail, LOL.

I also got a missed call from TJ. Aha. x) He was probably gonna ask me if I'm better now, you know, since I cried over Jerry while on the phone with my bestest friendd ever. LOL


Some people DO still care about me in this world. :)<3


-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


1. When you looked at yourself in the mirror today, what was the first thing you thought?
I miss my long hair..

2. How much cash do you have on you?
$30, goshhh I’m broke..

3. What's a word that rhymes with "DOOR?"
The whore on the floor is next to the door.

4. Favorite planet?
Your anus :)

5. Who is the 4th person on your missed call list on your cell phone?
Marquis.

6. What is your favorite ring on your phone?
On Top – Trey Songz

7. What shirt are you wearing?
Spaghetti strap.

8. Do you "label" yourself?
Nope.

9. Name the brand of your shoes you're currently wearing?
I’m not wearing shoes right now. -_-

10. Bright or Dark Room?
Semi bright?

11. What do you think about the person who took this survey before you?
I took this off a survey site, HAHAHA.

13. What were you doing at midnight last night?
Sleeping?

14. What did your last text message you received on your cell say?
The text up there^^^ from Rafael.<3

15. Where is your nearest 7-11?
I don’t knowww?

16. What's a word that you say a lot?
Niggaaa. jk, I'm not black. x) LOL I don't really know.

17.Who told you he/she loved you last?
My bestfrienddd<3

18. Last furry thing you touched?
My blanket

19. How many drugs have you done in the last three days?
Zeroo.

20. How many rolls of film do you need developed?
None, it’s all about digital.

21. Favorite age you have been so far?
I don’t know.

22. Your worst enemy?
Myself.

23. What is your current desktop picture?
Harajuku lovers.

24. What was the last thing you said to someone?
Dad, my teeth hurt.. I need to go to the dentist..

25. If you had to choose between a million bucks or to be able to fly what would it be?
Oh fo’ shooooo the millions! I can fly on my PRIVATE JET ! Haha!

26. Do you like someone?
Yes... :\

27. The last song you listened to?
Tears – Asia Cruise

Blah today was alright, it was cold though '& I'm still sick. :O Anthony Jay let me borrow his wrestling jacket.<3 I love that loser, aha.

Ignoring Jerry has been harder than everrr, but I think I'm doing good so far. EVEN THOUGH HE SWITCHED TO MY 6th PERIOD! ):<

Because I'm not good enough for ANYONE and it's apparent.. I CRIED OVER JERRY for the first time ever today. :O

Having a swollen eye SUCKS. Ahrrrg, it hurts. :|

Jerry bit mee, wtf!? Yeah, he BIT my shoulder because I wouldn't say hi to him; so then I hit him on the head with my phone. He doesn't deserve a hi from me, and that's a fact. He's soo rude & immature. I don't even know what I saw in him in the first place. Everytime I try to forget all about him, he comes and RUINS it for me; BUT NOT THIS TIME. He made me realize what a little bitch he really is. There's nothing he can do now to change my mind.

Wooo it's TJ's 21st birthday! :) HAPPY BiRTHDAY BESTFRiENDD !<3

Happy Single's Awareness Day, aha. x]

Lil sister's birthdaay. Mhmm pho, cake, and good food today. Aha.




- I love my bestfriends Anthony & TJ.<3 :)

I will never be her. I'm NOTHING like her. Stop mixing me up for someone I'm not.

I'm hurt, but I'd never show you.
I keep my guards up because I'm afraid of looking weak.

Boy am I glad. Finals week is over![: I think I did pretty good on the World Lit. finals. It was somewhat easy, I don't know why people were complaining. Anywhos, I chopped all my hair off! :O It's soo short now. I kind of regret chopping it off because it's TOO FUCKING SHORT, but I kind of don't, because it was DEAD when it was long. & you could see that I have split ends from far away! :O

"It'll grow back. Give me two months".- Sunshine.

I have to admit, he's pretty cute[:

Finalss are stressing me out! & It's soo nerve racking! My test for band was playing the scales, and I fucked up A LOT because I was sooo nervous. Catrina said I was shaking. LOL. Ahhh, I already know my score in Government, and it's not that good. I got 48/75 FAiL ): Kind of sad how that's one of the highest scores in my class period. My class is full of failure, lol. All I have to worry about now is World Literature.

there's a fucked up ending to it. & that's what happened to us. Truth be told, I miss you but I wish I never met you.